


To Build A Home

by TheLionGirl (KissMySelfie)



Series: No Lovers 'Verse [2]
Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F, pretty much just fluff, there is one percent angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-03
Updated: 2017-10-02
Packaged: 2018-12-23 09:55:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11987415
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KissMySelfie/pseuds/TheLionGirl
Summary: Alex looks down. Lena crosses the distance between them, but in the end it’s Alex who takes Lena’s hand and rests their forehead together.“I can’t sleep without you anymore,” she confesses.“I didn’t have a good night of sleep either.” Lena leaves a small kiss on Alex’s lips and they both smile just a little. “So breakfast…”---Scenes of Alex & Lena's building a home after the wedding.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm back! As I promised.  
> Lots of love to myblackbox who was the beta for this work!
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

When they get to the honeymoon suit, there is not the rush that Alex always imagined being between newly weds. At first, the Agent thinks it could be because they were actually married over a month ago, but then she realizes it’s because there is no need to rush. They are not lovers in a cheap hotel paying by the hour for smelly rooms and dirty sheets. They are not teenagers fumbling their way to know each other’s bodies.

If Alex felt brave enough, she’d say that they are soul mates whose souls have danced together for long enough to know their pace; to take their time and to not waste touches.

Alex sets their bags by the bed, sends Kara a text telling that they arrived just fine, and opens the curtains recognizing the feeling that was taking over her chest.

She feels Lena standing behind her, holding her.

“This way I’m going to get jealous of the view,” the CEO purrs into her ear.

Alex smiles and turns around but whatever she was going to say gets lost when she takes in the sight of Lena and what she’s wearing. Red lingerie. Red. It was Lena’s color after all.

“Wow,” the Agent whispers.

“Alex Danvers, speechless? That’s a first,” Lena mocks and Alex shakes her head.

“For you, Lena Danvers, all the time”

Lena blushes but it doesn’t last because her wife pulls her closer and kisses her softly, hungrily; it’s too much; it’s not enough; it’s perfect and it redirects the blood from her face downwards. They only break apart when they fall on the bed with Alex on top of Lena and they both smiling softly.

The CEO rests her hand against Alex's cheek bringing her face closer to hers. Their lips are barely touching as they share the same breath. “Make love to me.”

The kiss that follows feels new, as impossible as it sounds.

There are “I love you’s” after every orgasm.

There’s an “I love you” in every kiss

Not every "I love you" is said

It doesn't need to be said.

“I Love you, Lena Danvers.”

“I Love you, Alex Danvers.”

===

The first night they get back from their honeymoon, Lena’s phone rings in the middle of the night. Blocked number. Alex wakes up too feeling her wife move next to her.

“Hello?” Lena says.

“Hello, sister.”

Lena freezes for a second. She feels Alex’s hand on her arm and is brought back to reality, putting it on speakers so Alex could hear it too.

“Lex,” she says.

Alex’s sleepiness is gone and she reaches for her own phone to call the DEO. She signs to Lena to keep talking.

“Tell your wife not to bother,” Lex says. “I’m familiar with the DEO and their drill. This is just going to be a quick call.”

“What do you want, Lex?”

“I need to know something, Lena.”

Of course, he needs something, he wants something from her, just like Lillian, Lena thinks.

“Are you happy?”

Lena can tell the question isn’t meant to be ironic. There is no hurt in it. For a second it reminds her of the Lex that protected her from Lilian when they were kids, the Lex who taught her to play chess, who made her feel like she belonged with the Luthors.

“What?” she asks, confused.

“Are you happy?” he repeats.

She glances over at Alex and a smile comes unbidden to her lips.

What would it hurt to be honest, she thinks. “Happier than I ever thought I could be.”

There is silence and then line goes dead. Alex pulls her closer, worried and asking if she is okay. Lena doesn’t lie when she says she is.

===

Two days later there is a package on their apartment mat with the word “sister” written on it. Alex makes sure it’s not from Kara before calling the DEO. She knew the phone call a few days latter wasn’t the last they’d hear from Lex, but if he thought that short conversation managed to hurt Lena, he was very wrong.

Two hours later Lena and Alex get the 'okay' from the DEO team. Definitely, there is nothing fatal inside. Alex takes the DEO team to the door Lena opens the package. Alex returns to Lena’s side just in time to see her unwrap a white chess queen.

“What does it mean?” Alex asks.

“It’s a message of truce,” Lena says touching the piece lightly. “Back when we were a normal family, if we ever were, Lex and I fought, just like any siblings do. We weren't good with apologies, still we played chess every night, regardless of if we were talking or not. One day, after we fought, I don’t even remember what about, we were playing chess and he left his queen open and there was no trap in it. It wasn’t an apology, but it was his way to make amends. It became our way of calling a truce. He’s giving me his queen. He’s telling that he is not going to attack.”

Alex wraps her arms around Lena’s waist from behind as the CEO puts the piece back into the package.

“Do want to talk about what are you feeling?”

“If I knew what I was feeling. He could just be evil like Lillian. It would be so much simpler.”

“We all wish things were either black or white. Sure, Lex does evil things and so does Lillian, but that doesn’t mean you can’t love them or that you can’t care for them. In some ways they are part of you and that is not a bad thing, You can miss him and you can love him. Nobody has the right to judge you for that. I will never think any less of you for that.”

"Did you take some psychology class that I'm not aware of?" Lena asks.

"No, that's actually Vazques’ fault."

===

Alex and Lena are at James’ studio a couple floors bellow Kara’s office. They were there for almost half an hour, but for Alex it already felt like an eternity. Make up, hair, clothes... It was all a bit too much for her taste.

“If you could hold Lena just like this, that would be great,” James says positioning the camera.

Alex moves uncomfortably, while Lena is pretty much used to it by now. So Lena takes Alex’s hands and places them like James instructed. When their eyes meet, Lena smiles at her and they both laugh together in an intimacy that in that moment, James’ camera could only capture visually.

The Agent get a bit looser than before, but her pose is a bit too stiff and she’s got the eyes of a cat looking for a way out. Cat herself was in the other end of the room chatting with Kara and it surely didn’t make Alex any more comfortable.

“Okay, Jimmy, that’s enough or our Agent here might just jump out of the window,” Cat says, placing a hand on James' shoulder.

“I’ve got everything I needed anyway,” he says and leaves the room.

“Shall we continue this at my office?” Cat says and the women follow her to the elevator.

“I still don’t like the idea of being on the cover of CatCo,” Alex complains.

“Please! You just married one of the most influent women in National City. You are going to be on the cover of every magazine in National City whether you like it or not. I’m just setting the table. After all, first impressions are a big deal in business.”

The elevator doors open and they make their way to Cat’s office. Alex nods at some familiar faces and James mouths her ‘good luck’ with his best charming smile.

“Close the door, Alice,” Cat asks Alex’s after she enters behind them.

Alex obeys.

“Let’s just get this over with,” Alex says crossing her arms.

Her attention turns to Kara who is outside Cat’s office waving at her and making positive signs and faces that actually crack her sister cranky face. That is until Cat turns around and sees her reporter making a fool out of herself. Kara runs so fast out of there that Alex’s thinks she might have used a bit of super speed.

Cat clears her throat and starts the recording. “So Alex, how is it to be married to one of the most influential women in National City?”

“To be married to Lena is one of the happiest, unexpected things that ever happened in my life. I wouldn’t trade it for anything.” Alex says looking over to her wife, Lena’s pleased eyes shine back at her.

Cat turned to Lena. “I heard that it was Lena who popped the question. Care to share what made you take such a big step in your relationship?"

“It was the thought of not being with her. It bothered me and after so many things that happened to us from the moment we meet until that point it seemed like the next step to take.”

There is about ten other question in the interview and before each one, Alex prayed Vasquez would call her so she’d have an excuse to get out of there. But then she’s pretty sure that if there was an emergency J’onn wouldn’t let Vasquez call her just to punish her. He wasn’t pleased about all the media she got after the wedding.

It didn’t take too long for them to identify the girl with the auburn short hair with an obsession with dark clothes. And once they did, J’onn had to create a whole new identity for Alex to use, so as to avoid Lena being targeted (as if that was possible), which meant double the headache for him.

“I think that’s all,” Cat says stopping the recorder. Lena and Cat both get up before Alex realizes she is supposed to do the same. “Dinner Friday?” Cat asks.

Lena agrees before Alex can say anything. Lena hears Alex complaining all week until she teases that all of Alex’s complaining might cause her to not be in the “mood”. Lena doesn’t hear another complaint after that.

====

One good thing might come from the CatCo interview: women stop thinking Alex is single.

After so long, it ended up bothering Alex more than Lena, especially that one time when someone had mistaken Lena and Kara for a couple and started flirting with the older Danvers. Alex had taken Lena's face in her hands and kissed her out of breath.

"My wife," Alex had said to the person, "so I suggest you get lost".

Lena had pulled Alex closer by her waist.

"Guys, not in front of me" Kara had complained.

Alex smirks and Lena bites her lip. 

Somehow they made it through the game night without blowing off some steam in the bar's bathroom, but as soon as they got home, Lena attacked her wife. They don't even reach the bedroom before Alex's second orgasm and Lena's third and they only do so because they need something from it.

They stop for snacks, and to take care of a much needy Luna, but as the cat settled back into sleep and Alex manages to sort-out an almost DEO crisis without actually having to go there, the CEO could sense another round coming.

"Is it bad that I find protective Alex kind of hot?" Lena asks as Alex is coming out of the bedroom, only in a t-shirt and panties.

"Oh, it’s so bad," Alex says trying too hard.

Lena laughs. For a secret agent, her wife was awful at roleplaying.

"Maybe I should punish you" Alex climbs on the top of Lena and dives for a kiss while sliding the covers away from them.

===

Two months after their wedding, J’onn quits his position and apoints her to be the Director of the DEO.

(She’s sure he bribed the president a little to let Alex have the position). (Alex is still in bad terms with the woman since their last meeting).

While the whole DEO applauds, Alex is frozen. She waits for the gesture to die out and steps closer to the former director.

"J'onn, can we have a word?" she asks.

"Of course, your office, Director?" he asks teasingly. She rolls her eyes and closes the door after they get there.

"What do you think you are doing?" she snaps, pacing in the room.

"I’ve got nothing else to teach you, Alex, and you can’t expect me to run the DEO forever. It's time for me to step down, spend more time with M'gann and the kids and the rest of the family. Also, I'm not what the DEO needs anymore."

"What are you talking about?"

"This year you brought in and trained the first aliens agents of the DEO. The DEO, who a couple of years ago, was only worried about containing aliens, now is worried about protecting them. That was’t me. That was you. And it needs you to keep moving forward."

He grabs her shoulders making her stop and look into his eyes.

"Besides." He shrugs. "There is no one else I'd trust with this."

She looks around to see if anyone is watching before pulling him into a hug. J'onn struggles to remember that he cannot hug her with all of his strength.

When the Agent - now Director - gets home, she avoids Lena’s eyes but, of course, her wife insists in asking what’s wrong.

“I’ve been promoted to J’onn position,” she mumbles under her breath.

“What?”

Alex repeats it again, this time more clearly. It takes a second to Lena to react, but when she does, Alex is sure the woman is going to die from laughing so much. When she does stop, there still is a giant smile on her face and something else as she leans closer to her wife and whispers in her ear.

"So... I guess it's Director Danvers now." She is grinning. “That’s hot. I’ve never been fucked by a director.”

It takes little thought for Alex to pull Lena into her lap and kiss her. Her wife smiles into the kiss and she can feel Alex’s already toying with the edge of her shirt.

She is kissing Alex’s neck when she gets an idea. “Have I been a good agent, Director Danvers?”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Same warnings as last chapter.  
> Enjoy.

Looking back, Alex had it coming.

One thing Alex always teased her wife about was her addiction to sugary things. In the mornings they were both late enough, or lazy enough, to not make breakfast, Lena’s go-to was cereal. Not any cereal, but cereal, that according to Alex, was sweeter than sugar.

“You know, you could just put sugar in your milk and it would taste just the same. It’s really gross,” Alex teased her wife as she sat down next to her on the couch.

Lena frowned. “If it’s so gross then why do you keep eating it?”

“I don’t eat it.”

“You do. Monday, the box was full, today, when I picked up the box it was half empty.”

“You must have eaten it and forgotten.” Alex shruged and Lena probably could have continued arguing, but it would have gotten her nowhere.

Days later, Lena was about to make her bowl of cereal, but as she picked up the box, she groaned. It was empty.

“For God’s sake! Alex!” she called her wife who came from the bedroom with her toothbrush hanging in her mouth. “You know I don’t mind you eating my cereal but when you finish it buy more and throw the box away!”

Alex went back to the bathroom and came back wiping her mouth. “I didn’t eat it. I appreciate my teeth enough to not eat it.”

Lena raises her eyebrow. So that’s how they were playing. She took a deep breath and turned around. Alex was going to regret it.

And she does.

Three days later at 2:37 am Lena feels Alex slipping out of the bed. Lena waits until she hears Alex’s opening the refrigerator door to make her way to the kitchen making use of the shadows. Alex is still looking for the milk, (Lena had hidden it), when Lena hides behind the kitchen island. The bowl of cereal is already set on it and Lena waits until she hears her wife saying ‘found it’ to jump out of her hiding place.

“Gotcha!” Lena screams and Alex screams and lets the milk fall.

Lena is laughing as Alex presses her hand against her chest, painting and bending over the counter. “What the hell, Lena!”

“I told you, you were eating my cereal.” Lena smiles a bit more before stepping closer to her wife, and hugging her while petting her hair trying to calm down. “I should’ve recorded it,” Lena whispers before Alex hits her playfully. “Winn would’ve loved it.”

“You almost gave me a heart-attack.”

“I know. But it’s okay, I forgive you,” she says kissing the top of Alex’s head.

“Forgive me?”

“And you lied to me, teased me, and ate my cereal. How about this, you clean this mess and we are even.” Alex pulls away from the embrace with her mouth half open ready to argue when Lena takes her wife’s lips on her own. She lets her shoulders fall before giving in as the kiss ends.

“You are lucky that I love you.”

 

===

 

“Stop looking at me like that, I don’t have any surprises this Thanksgiving,” Alex says to Eliza durring the first Thanksgiving at her place after the wedding. Eliza doesn’t look convinced.

“Is it grandchildren?” Eliza asks and Alex shoots her an incredulous look. “What? You can’t expect me to not expect something. DEO, lesbian, Maggie, Lena, wedding…”

“Are you keeping a list?”

“Not yet.”

“You already have a grandchild. Luna.” She points at the sleeping cat over the couch.

“And Krypto,” Kara feels the need to add.

“A non-animal kind of grandchildren. I mean… I’m not getting any younger here. Lena, help me on this.” Eliza turns to the newest Danvers who is looking amused by Alex side.

“Sorry, no grandchildren yet, but there is Alex’s promotion.”

“Promotion? Why didn’t know about that?” This time she turns to Kara.

“I forgot about it. It’s not much different from her former job, really,” Kara says. "She still bosses me around."

“So, what is it now? Vice-President, or something?”

It’s Lena who blurred out as her wife sipped her drink, “Director.” and both of the older Danvers woman choke a little.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Is it me or is somebody else having some kind of deja vu?” Winn whispers to Kara and Jeremiah pats his shoulder.

“It didn’t seem important.” Alex shrugs as Lena plays with her hair.

 

===

 

“I’ll go first. Cover me,” Maggie says checking her gun for ammunition before running out of behind half a wall and with Alex on her heels as they reach another wall. “Alex, when did you know that you were… like in love with Lena and everything?”

“Really Sawyer?" They hear shooting from not so far away. "This is not the time or place to talk about this. They could be literally anywhere now.” Looking around, Alex changes her mind and turn to Maggie. “Is this about Lucy?”

“Maybe.” Maggie stands up and crouches back down. “Run, they saw us!”

They are both running half a second later. Alex still manages to turn and shoot back the direction they were being shot from, but she’s unsure if she hit any of them.

“There are too many… How come it is only the two of us against all of them?”

“Because someone said we could do it!” Alex whispers angrily. “This time I go first!”

Alex reaches the next cover when she notices a movement coming towards her, but she doesn’t have much time to shoot before a pair of lips is upon hers.

She thinks of resisting only for a couple of seconds, before she recognized whose lips they were and then melted into the clash of mouths. And it was a kiss. Not any kiss. The kind of kiss that made Alex forget anything and everything around her but that woman. Her wife. Her Lena. Lena.

And it’s Lena who pulls away smirking.

“I’m sorry,” Lena says right before the paint ball hits Alex in her stomach and the agent takes some seconds to realize what just happened.

“I told you it would work!” Winn cheers with James in the background pulling Alex out of her shock (right before Maggie hits them both, eliminating them out of the game). 

“Et tu Lena?” Alex says and her wife can only kiss the corner of her mouth because she’s so cute.

“Dork.”

“Your dork.”

“Who I just eliminated at paintball.”

“You cheated.”

“I did not… All is fair in love and war.”

They hear a scream in the background and Alex knows that her team just lost.

“Okay, it was kind of unfair. Two against five.”

“Now you two can learn not to bribe so much. Besides,” and as she says this, Lena whispers into her wife’s ear, “I can always make it up to you later.”

(Alex still doesn’t like losing, but it doesn’t feel quite as bad).

 

===

 

They go to the park after the paintball.

Winn is complaining about being sore and James leans against him laughing. Kara is enjoying her three scoops of ice cream ,chatting with James Alex and Lena follow a bit behind holding hands.

Alex hears fake vomiting sounds behind her and she turns to find Maggie walking to their side.

“Ew,” the detective says as she catches up with them. “I never thought you would be the kind of couple who hold hands everywhere.”

“Jealous, Sawyer?”

At the same time Alex teases her, Lena says “Actually, it’s a very efficient method of keeping her out of trouble. She can’t do anything stupid if I’ve got a good grip on her.”

Alex has a shocked face while Maggie is having her fun with it.

“Smart Luthor. I knew there was I reason I liked you,” Maggie says pulling out her flirting eyes. “If you ever get tired of Danvers…”

“Stop flirting with my wife, Sawyer.”

“You were the one who turned down the foursome, and the threesome, both offers. And it’s good to feel appreciated every now and then,” surprisingly it’s Lena's voice.

“Suck it, Danvers!”

“Okay,” Alex says stopping them and placing her hand on Lena’s hips. “How about we skip dinner and go home so I can show you,” she steps closer “how much I appreciate you.”

“Keep it in your pants, Danvers. We are in the middle of a park.” It’s James' voice.

“I didn’t even kiss her, Olsen,” Alex shouts back.

“Yeah, and it was barely PG, imagine if you did kiss her though. Maggie would probably have to arrest you."

"Shut it, Olsen or I'll give her a reason to arrest me," Alex says playfully, but Lena still maintains her grip on her keeping her wife from gravitating towards the boys.

Kara sees Maggie massaging her shoulder and a bit guilty she goes over to the girl. (She had tackled Maggie to the floor before taking her gun and shooting the cop with it. She might have become a bit too competitive).

“How are you feeling?” the blonde asks, licking already her second ice cream.

“Like I got hit by a car.”

“Well, good news, it wasn’t a car. Bad news, it was me. Sorry,” Kara says looking at her feet. “Here,” she stretches the hand holding her third, still untouched (or licked) ice cream. “Have it, as an apology. You’ll still be a bit sore tomorrow, but ice cream always helps.”

Maggie was going to refuse, but Kara just decided to pull that face. That face that could convince a fish to fly. So Maggie took the ice cream blushing a little.

What a strange and warm feeling. Love. Family. Belonging.

 

===

 

"So Lucy, huh," Alex says sitting next to Maggie on the park bench.

"I shouldn't have said anything," Maggie says ready to get up. Alex holds her down.

"Don't do that. Don't push me away. Don't push it away. I thought that was our thing." Alex doesn't let the silence settle between them. "So you like Lucy."

"I mean, yeah. She's annoying with all that sass that somehow fits into that small body of hers and she has a nice laugh and she's smart and..." Maggie lets out a sigh. "I have every reason to like her, I have every reason to want to be with her but there is one reason that won't let me."

And that's when the detective lets her eyes meet Alex's.

"I don't feel with her what I felt with you. Or Kate. I'm not in love with her."

This time Alex lets the silence slip in between them, but doesn't allow it to push them apart. Instead, she rests her hand on Maggie's back.

"Take it from someone who thought she was straight for almost three decades. A lot can change in a day, in a moment. It might not be with Lucy, but I doubt someone like you won't find someone special to spend your life with. Either way, we are here for you. Your own, strange, dysfunctional family."

 

===

 

The white chess piece Lex left for Lena was not the last contact the CEO had with her brother (only the last one known to her wife).

Not long after their truce, Lena noticed how one of the pawns in her chess board (the white ones, always the white ones) at her office had moved, and then she moved another pawn (a black pawn). The days passed and Lena became sure she was playing with some sort of a ghost, a ghost that she knew was her brother.

It took them months to finish a single game of chess, and Lena had no idea how he managed to move the pieces, but by the end of the game, Lena left a note: ‘ _I've won_ ’ she writes. She doesn’t know what to expect, but surely not a new letter in the next day written: ‘ _Pick your price_ ’ - and they’ve started a new round already.

She is not foolish enough to think that he will actually do anything she asks him - she is trying really hard to not convince herself that it was a sign that Lex was changing, that her brother was good again - so she went with a question.

 _‘Do you ever have regrets about what happened?_ ’

The answer: ‘ _I’ve been flirting with the thought that I was not as right as I once thought to be_.'

She reads those words countless times, trying to find a meaning that makes sense coming from Lex. A man who had destroyed half a city to take down one man and calling all the lives lost a collateral damage… It did not sound like the same man, but it reminded her of her brother.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Damn, what is Lex up to?   
> *dramatic music*


	3. Chapter 3

"Do you really have to go?" Alex asks her at the airport holding her wife's waist who is smiling. She never had someone begging her to stay. Not like this. Not with this much love.

"It's going to be three days, no more, no less, and then I'm all yours for the whole weekend. I may even turn off my phone just for you." Lena bites her lower lips and grips at the end of Alex's scarf as if trying to pull Alex in.

Alex's chest visibly rises and fall as she takes a deep breath. Lena knows that if they were home, they'd be falling into bed given the look her wife had on her face. It still amused her how tough and scary Director Danvers turned into a needy and greedy pet in their bed.

Lena kisses Alex at her jawline before leaving a brief kiss on her lips. Alex tries to hold her until the tips of Lena's fingers slip from hers and she watches as Lena disappears into the airport gates.

===

Fifty-six hours until Lena arrives and Alex is bored. She had even extended her shift at the DEO trying to avoid it. When J'onn found out about it, he "convinced" her to go home.

"Go or I am calling Director Lane," he had said.

She even groans from remembering.

Alex Danvers and Lucy Lance were good friends, could even be best friends if they didn't live across the country from each other and barely spoke once a month. Director Lane and Director Danvers couldn't even agree on lunch hour and Lane liked rules. She was a freaking lawyer after all. Danvers knew the rules. She knew each one of the rules so she could break them and still scream at her Agents when they did. Lucy and the President herself were the only ones with enough authority to do the same to Alex.

So she went home with way too much spare time.

She calls Kara. She calls Kara four times before Kara actually picks it up. She knows from an alert she programmed on her phone that Supergirl is not out right now.

"I'm bored. What are you doing?" Alex says once Kara picks up.

"Trying to not get fired. It's layout day and sometimes Cat forgets that I am not her assistant anymore and everything is crazy right now. Can I call you later?"

She hangs up before Alex can respond.

The director throws her phone to the other side of the couch and tries to find something to watch on Netflix.

This one I have to wait for Kara. This one I have to wait for Lena. This one I have to wait for both of them. This looks like something Winn would like. Such a nerd. Reminder, don't let Winn and Lena have movie nights with you; it's only fun for them.

She feels like she's gone thru every title at least twice and she knows that there are several that seemed like her taste but she feels too bothered by the emptiness at the apartment to actually be still.

Luna jumps next to her on the couch and 'meows' telling Alex to move because she's sitting on her spot. Alex moves because Lena is right: she spoils the cat just as much as her wife. Luna curls into herself. Alex starts to pet and Luna slowly gives into a soft purring.

"I miss Lena," she tells the cat. "You probably miss her too."

===

Fifty hours until Lena arrives and Luna wakes up Alex in the middle of the night and leads the woman towards her sandbox.

"Shit. I forgot to clean it didn't I? In my defense, it's usually your other mother who does this before bed. Don't look at me like that. I know how to function without Lena I'm just... not used to it. Fifty hours and she'll be back."

===

Forty-seven hours until Lena arrives and Alex is making breakfast. At least trying. Luna is probably happy that she doesn't depend on Alex's cooking skill to eat because it must be the third time she sees Alex breaking the fire detector trying to shut it down.

She ends up calling Kara.

"What is it? Where should I go? Is Lena okay?"

Kara sounds like she just woke up. Alex looks at the clock, 5 am. She forgot most of the people don't wake up before the sun was shining.

"Want to go out for breakfast?"

Was it not about food Kara might have hung up. "Ten minutes. I pick the place."

===

Thirty hours until Lena's return and Alex knows she's bothered Kara all day so when Luna curls on Lena's side of the bed leaving Alex alone on the couch with several work papers on her lap and with her mind wandering, she skips Kara's name moving to the next one.

"Danvers, you better be dead or dying," Maggie answers aggressively, Alex doesn't allow her tone to bother her.

"Wanna come over to watch movies."

"Alex, I'm about to get laid for the first time in months, unless you have something better than that to offer you know my answer."

"But..." the line goes dead "...movies"

===

She lasts one hour of boredom before calling Kara. This time it takes three tries until she picks it up.

"Alex, I'm kind of busy right now. Can we talk tomorrow."

"Do you need help? I could come over. Or you could come over..."

"Alex, I'm really busy..."

There is an odd noise on the side of the line and she can almost make up Kara and Cat's voice before she hears the older woman more clearly.

"Agent Danvers," (she knows that it's Director now, she just doesn't care) "I suggest you hang up right now and don't call until the sun is rising again otherwise you might hear about every little thing I do when I am in between your sister's leg under the covers."

Alex hangs up.

She feels like she hangs up too late.

She thinks about calling J'onn about the mind weapon technology.

===

After what feels like an eternity Lena comes back . No one sees them for the whole weekend.

===

The next chess game, Lena lets Lex win. She lets him win because she’s not ready to know what she wants to ask, so it’s better for her to not be tempted to. She lets him win and he knows.

 _You let me win_ \- it’s on the first note, it’s not a question. It is not the question.

 _Pick your price_ \- she writes back.

_Do you still love me?_

The question hurts a little because it’s simpler not to think about it. She can’t concentrate the whole day because of it. When she is finally leaving to find some comfort in her wife’s arms she almost doesn’t leave a not. She almost doesn’t, but some guilty and something else stops her from doing it.

The answer: _Yes_.

===

“You’re not going to finish the game?” Alex asks a couple weeks later when she comes to pick Lena up pointing at the chess board.

Lena freezes. She had been thinking if she should tell Alex about it and her conclusion was that she should have done it a while ago and if she told her she was afraid of how the Director would react. She would tell Alex, she would, just not in that moment, not until she figures out the right words.

“Um… No. I use it to take my mind off work, you know. I play it against myself.”

Alex frowns at Lena’s answer but settles back on the couch after moving one of the pieces and waits for Lena to finish her work.

Lena puts the piece back in its place and makes her own move.

She will tell Alex. She will.

Just not now.

It's not the right time.

Is there a right time?

===

Maggie arrives just before Lena leaves for her dinner with Karen. The same former-lover Karen. Alex was still a little bothered by it, Lena could tell but she didn’t say anything because they had this talk before and they agreed that they would work on that. And that was it, Alex was dealing with letting her wife go to dinner with a woman that used to sleep with the CEO and she was not following her, not sending anyone to follow her also.

Maggie, in the middle of it all, was not predicted. Alex was already in her pajamas - the cute ones, that she remembered were a gift from Kara and had all these little ducks.

“You’re leaving,” Maggie says surprised.

“I am. I have a dinner with a friend. Alex is staying though,” Lena says, before leaving a kiss on Alex’s cheek and giving Maggie a hug. “I’ll be back before midnight.”

“Don’t do anything I wouldn’t, Cinderella,” Alex says as Lena enters the elevator. She turns to Maggie. “Beer?”

“Please,” Maggie says entering and setting herself on the kitchen island and Luna jumps next to her. “You really are not sending Kara or James to keep an eye on them? With Lena dressed like that, if I were you I wouldn’t even be able to let her leave the apartment.”

“Believe me, a while back I probably would think the same thing, but we’ve talked enough about it and I trust Lena. The real problem is that I don’t trust her company, but there is nothing I can do about that.” Alex tells her. “It is a good thing you're here. You can help me take my mind off it. So, what’s up?”

“Nothing, I was bored. Lucy is busy packing her things and either way I won’t have her around for long since she’s moving back to DC.”

“Oh. Okay.” Alex scratches her head. “Why don’t you um… Tell me how you feel about it?”

“We are not together and I’m not in love with her, you know that. I’m just…” she looks down at her beer. “I’m tired of being alone.”

“You’re not alone,” Alex says with a frown.

“C’mon, you know what I mean, Danvers.”

“I know what you mean, Sawyer, but that doesn’t change anything. You are not alone. You have me, James, Winn, Kara, J’onn, M’gann, Lena, Vasquez… Do you want me to go on? And on the subject that’s really bothering you… Believe me, when you least expect, it will come. Just stop trying to fill in holes and just let it be.”

“Is that what you did with Lena?”

“I don’t even know what I did with Lena. If I was trying to fill a hole back then, certainly it was not that hole, but it happened.”

“I just feel… old, I guess. Everybody I know is either married or marrying.”

“Ok, first, you’re my age so we are not old. Second, trust me, when it happens it won’t matter if it was six months before or after. It just feels too right to matter. But since I know you won’t hear me, I do know how to make it better, for now at least. Die Hard marathon.”

===

Lena arrives at midnight on the dot and it’s surprising to find her wife and Detective Sawyer sleeping on the floor with movies credits rolling on the screen.

She takes off her heels and throws a blanket over them. There are too many beers can on the trash, but the CEO doesn’t think most of them were Alex’s. Lena takes a picture of both of them and goes to bed.

===

Lex wins the next chess game, this time without Lena letting him win.

_Would you ever forgive me if I asked?_

The problem? Alex finds the note. She finds the note and when she questioned Lena, her wife’s silence is incriminating enough before she notices that the calligraphy on the note is familiar. It takes a bit longer but Alex makes the connection with the package received six months before.

“Is this Lex’s?” and Alex tone is harsher than usual. “Have you been talking to him?”

She tries to calm her down. “It’s not that simple.”

“So you haven’t been talking to one of the most wanted criminals in the world?” And Alex’s voice is louder than usual and Lena doesn’t like it. She doesn’t like the way her wife is talking to her right now, like the situation is worse than it actually is. “I thought we told each other everything”.

“This why I didn’t tell you. Because of the way you are looking at me right now; the same way you used to look at before…”

“Of course, this is my fault now. You’ve been talking to a criminal who wants my sister and her cousin dead and I am the one to blame. He was here, Lena. We could’ve caught him; he could’ve have told something…”

“You think I didn’t check the security cameras? I did and passed it thru every program known to see if it caught him. It didn’t. You wanna know what we’ve been talking about?”

Lena reaches for her drawer and takes out a small pile of papers that couldn’t even be called a pile and throws them in front of Alex.

“There is everything and I assure you, you will be disappointed. No, I haven’t been talking to a criminal, I have been talking to my brother. In spite of everything he’s done and whether I like it or not, he is still my brother and there is no ‘on and off’ switch for me caring for him. Now do me a favor, Director,” she remarks the word “and leave I have work to do.”

Alex hesitated before leaving. The CEO is sure she can hear her wife footstep leaving the building even being so many floors away.

She lets Alex’s voice go to her voicemail three times before it’s Kara who calls.

“Alex said you two fought. She just wants to know if you are okay.”

"I'm fine I just need some space."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry.


	4. Chapter 4

Lena goes back home and Alex is still up watching TV on the couch. They don’t exchange any words but a look. The CEO recognizes the worry in her wife’s eyes, but she also notices Alex’s pillow and a blanket on the couch.  
  
   
  
Lena takes a shower and goes to bed.  
  
   
  
It feels awfully empty.  
  
   
  
===  
  
   
  
Lena wakes up to noises. Several things falling, and Alex’s sailor’s mouth. She even lets out a smile before remembering what had passed between them.  
  
   
  
She takes her robe and goes to the kitchen hoping it is enough to shield her emotions from what was about to happen. Could Alex be leaving her? That seemed like such an insignificant fight to cause their separation after all they've been through. She doesn't want it to end because of something they barely talked about., something that she didn't have the chance to explain.  
  
   
  
There is a small relief when she finds her wife in the kitchen. At the same time, it is also a worry - that is not a good mix. She watches Alex messily move around the kitchen for five minutes before she is seen due to Luna meowing at her.  
  
   
  
“Shit,” Alex says turning to her. “You weren’t supposed to be up yet.”  
  
   
  
Lena was ready to go to her cold mode but then she noticed what was happening.  
  
   
  
“I couldn’t sleep,” Alex says scratching the back of her head. “I was wrong to act the way I did and I have no fair excuse. I was scared.” She starts pulling at her sleeves trying to keep herself from going towards Lena, whose expression is softening by second. “I was so scared of something happening to you that part of my brain just stopped functioning and I snapped at you. I was going to do it in bed, make you some breakfast in bed but…”  
  
   
  
“Well, I wasn’t exactly right either. I should’ve told you before.”  
  
   
  
Alex looks down. Lena crosses the distance between them, but in the end it’s Alex who takes Lena’s hand and rests their forehead together.  
  
   
  
“I can’t sleep without you anymore,” she confesses.  
  
   
  
“I didn’t have a good night of sleep either.” Lena leaves a small kiss on Alex’s lips and they both smile just a little. “So breakfast…”  
  
   
  
Lena reaches behind Alex to take a piece of  one of the pancakes (the only thing Alex has a fair success in the making) and eats, barely managing to swallow it. Alex watches it a little amused as Lena tries to now show it.  
  
   
  
“Um… Good…” Lena fakes it.  
  
   
  
“Salty? I might have mistaken the salt for sugar,” Alex laughs as she takes Lena a cup of water and throws away the rest of the pancake batter. “Noonan’s?”  
  
   
  
===  
  
   
  
They are in the bathtub together. Softly and lazily Alex washes Lena’s back every now and then drawing a moan from her wife, making sure to press and loosen those knots on her back from all the stress. When Alex is finishing, she starts to leave small kisses on her backs, then her shoulders, then up to her neck, to the base of her jaw.  She can feel Lena's skin pulling as she smiles.  
  
   
  
The Director pulls her closer and leans them both back and Lena's finger finds her hair, which is almost shoulder length now and swirls it around her finger.  
  
   
  
“This feels good,” Lena admits.  
  
   
  
"It does," Alex agrees with a deep inhalation, taking in her wife's scent mixed with the bath.  
  
   
  
Alex hums into her hair and they are connected on such a deeper level in that moment that Lena feels her wife's mind slip away.  
  
   
  
“Lee, about Lex,” Alex begins.  
  
   
  
The mention of his name change Lena’s stance automatically. She feels her back tighten, her hands contract, and her jaw tense.  
  
   
  
“If something suspicious happens, if you get a bad feeling or anything, you’ll tell me right?” Lena softens back but turns her head around to find some surprising vulnerability in Alex’s eyes. “Here, I am your wife before I am the director. You know that right? You can trust me. You can talk to me.”  
  
   
  
Lena takes Alex’s hand, locking their fingers together and kisses it. Alex had such damaged hands. Such stained hands.  
  
   
  
“I do. I promise. I love you, Al.”  
  
   
  
“I love you, Lee. I'm just scared...” Alex chokes on her words.  
  
   
  
Lena sits up and turns to her wife with concern. "Scared of what?"  
  
   
  
"Of losing you. I don't know what I would do if something happened to you."  
  
   
  
"To me?" Lena smiles, and caresses Alex's cheek where a single tear has run down. It a comforting smile. "Do you have any idea how worried I get every day I hear you leave the DEO, or that something got into the DEO. Or worse, when something is trying to get out of the DEO. When I am thirty years old with half of my hair white, you Danvers girls are the ones to blame."  
  
   
  
"Yeah? Let me make it up for you..." Alex says, pulling her wife into a kiss. Lena smiles into it but pulls away.  
  
   
  
“Not right now, Romeo. It's time to switch.”  
  
   
  
They move around the bathtub so Alex is sitting between Lena's leg. While Lena loves when Alex washes her back - her soft strokes and her hard strokes that feel like a massage -, Alex likes to have Lena washing her hair. So she closes her eyes when her wife starts to massage her scalp, holding back most of the moans.  
  
   
  
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen your hair so long,” Lena says when her movements stop. “Is this a white hair?”  
  
   
  
Alex opens her ways. “Stop messing with me, Lee. I am not that old yet.”  
  
   
  
“Well, your hair and I will beg to differ. Maybe I should invest in a walking-stick for you.”  
  
   
  
“Shut up,” Alex turns around laughing and pulling Lena into a kiss. There was nothing like kissing with a smile in her lips.  
  
   
  
===  
  
   
  
“So instead of 'make-up-sex', you had 'make-up-breakfast'? Okay, you really are ruining marriage to me, Danvers,” Maggie teases her.  
  
   
  
"The was also 'make-up-bath' just so you know."  
  
   
  
"Did you fuck in it? Yeah, I thought so."  
  
   
  
===  
  
   
  
It’s not the first time they have sex in Lena’s office.  
  
   
  
Actually, they’ve done it in her office enough times to know which surfaces were better to which position.  
  
   
  
So Alex lifts Lena so she’s is sitting on her desk. She manages to push most of the papers and object out of the way without making much of a mess or making anything fall (she broke Lena’s computer once, she heard it about it enough times to be extra careful).  
  
   
  
They are kissing and they are both laughing in the middle of the kiss because it feels like it felt so many years ago and yet it doesn’t. It’s not the same because they are not the same people, but some things remain the same. Lena’s lip-bitting craze that drove Alex crazy. The way that Alex every other move would silently ask for confirmation. The way her words whispered on Lena’s ear made her wet.  
  
   
  
With her hand down Lena’s pants, she feels it and lets a grin take over her face. She pulls away her hand just to tease  
  
   
  
“Don’t you dare, Al!” Lena says pushing her wife’s hand back where she needs it.  
  
   
  
And Lena is in the middle of a moan when it happens. When they find out what’s different about this time. When Francis, Lena’s new secretary opens the door.  
  
   
  
“Mrs Danvers, I’d just like to remind you-“ He is absolutely mortified when he realizes what was happening inside the office. “Oh My God, I’m sorry. Forgive me, Mrs Danvers I didn’t know you were busy.”  
  
   
  
The mood is over and they go home. It takes a whole week before Francis can look at them in the eyes again.  
  
   
  
Francis leaves the door open when Alex visits next. She doesn't think he had ever seen a girl half naked before. She doesn't think he wants to. To make it up to him, for it for the first month she always brings him cupcakes when she visits. Noonan's cupcakes, of course.  
  
   
  
Lena sends him home earlier sometimes when Alex comes. He pretends he doesn’t know why.  
  
   
  
===  
  
   
  
“Does it bother you that you might be a director or whatever but you still can’t boss me around?” Maggie asks grinning one day.  
  
   
  
“Shut up, Sawyer.”  
  
   
  
===  
  
   
  
Lex turns himself in. He acknowledges all his crimes.  
  
   
  
Alex is sitting next to Lena in court. She holds her hand softly, squeezing from time to time to check on her. Alex is not good with her words, so these light touches are all she can do to let Lena know that she is there, that Lena has her, whatever happens.  
  
   
  
Kara is sitting at the end of the court room with Clark. They tried to keep him from coming but they only managed to keep him away from Lena, for both of their sake.  
  
   
  
The court session is ending and Lena is glad. It hurts to watch Lex sitting there looking back at her. Alex could see it too and wished she could build a machine to separate evil Lex from Lena’s Lex – and gosh, how that sounded like a bad idea.  
  
   
  
“One last question, Your Honor,” Lex’s lawyer said (he had been quiet most of the trial under, what Lena supposed to be Lex’s orders). “Mr.Luthor why did you turned yourself in?”  
  
   
  
“For my sister.”  
  
   
  
“Were you in contact with her?”  
  
   
  
(Lena’s heart speeds up.)  
  
   
  
“No. It’s been years since the last time I could actually talk to her. I turned myself in because I saw all that she accomplished these last years… The woman she became… And I was sorry for not being a part of her life, of not being there for her. I turned myself in because I love her and she deserves something better than a runaway brother.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Update 10.09.17:  
> There were some parts missing but none of them vital, I corrected it. Sorry.  
> Also some of you have been asking for a part 3 and I decided to make a 'oficial' announcement: yes, there will be a part 3 but it won't be any time soon (sorry again).  
> I'll be away for a while. Probably will try to finish my other story before posting a continuation for this one (also I'm trying to find out if I still have a beta - I'm horrible at communicating with other human beings).  
> Every now and then I'm still at tumblr, so if you want to talk, complain or just spend time hit me up @kiss-my-selfie.

**Author's Note:**

> It's always nice to know what you think!
> 
> Thanks for reading!


End file.
